In Sickness and Ineffective Pain Killers
by PrudentPrick
Summary: He's hunched over, vomiting, tears running down cheeks flushed in protest or from exertion, Kagura can't tell. His shoulders are shaking, and somewhere in between, Kagura can hear choked, miserable sobs along with short, pained gasps. Full summary and ratings inside. Related to Clothes Changer, but isn't required to read. Is not directly in sync with 'Clothes Changer's' timeline.


Fandom/Franchise: Blazblue

Rated: M

Warnings: Cursing, abuse of prescription drugs, abuse of painkillers

Related to: Clothes Changer

Summary: He's hunched over, vomiting, tears running down cheeks flushed in protest or from exertion, Kagura can't tell. His shoulders are shaking, and somewhere in between, Kagura can hear choked, miserable sobs along with short, pained gasps. 'This is the most I can do,' he figures as his feet move on their own, his hand reaching out to rub his back soothingly.

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

 **Some may know that I started writing a fic called 'Clothes Changer'. This is just a side fic to it. It can't be considered a chapter, but its a related fic. A one-shot that is in the same timeline of the fic, but not in occurrence to the chapters. This fic is where Ragna and Kagura have an okay relationship, and with this event it improves. Well, more like semi-domestic fluff between these two and Kagura being supportive and sweet. I'll try to keep them in character.**

 **I bet you guys are wondering about the title. Well, as in weddings, they usually say 'In sickness and in health'? I think. Well, in sickness and in ineffective painkillers. Since I want to keep some aspects of the normal Blazblue universe, so this story may get a little strange. I just want to normalize the idea of Ragna's grimoire being in this AU. So you will see how it comes into effect in this story.**

 **I hope its exciting enough to catch your attention. Please enjoy this.**

 **Edit: Well, the story took a turn that made it seem that they were in a relationship. They're not, but they're besties in this fic. This is just more progression in they're friendship, if anything.**

* * *

Its a normal school day, and Ragna already knows something is wrong. He had woken up a few minutes later than usual; eyes opening so fast that they could barely adjust to the light, chest feeling tight and constricted as he clutched at his own bed sheets.

So it was going to be one of those days.

It felt like his entire body was slowly shutting down as time progressed. His legs felt like lead. His head was pounding painfully, and the way his stomach tightened every so often was near unbearable. But he wasn't going to let it stop him today. If it subsided, maybe he could even try to go to school. Thinking about himself could wait. He had to get breakfast ready for Noel and Jin.

As the two slowly got ready for the day, he made sure their food was already out for them, as well as their umbrellas by the door. Jin had an uncanny habit of leaving his around the house, and Noel would have it stuck in the strangest of places.

"Brother, you're not coming to school with us?" Jin asked, expression sad. Ragna nodded, continuing to wash the dishes at a snail's pace, wanting to make sure they were completely cleaned.

"Yeah. Sorry, but I'll probably be waiting for you guys when you're on your way back. So cheer up, will ya?" he dried his hands and walked over, patting both of them on their head. "And don't forget to bring your umbrellas, supposed have heavy rain today." the two nodded enthusiastically, running to the door.

"Bye, brother." Jin said, still looking crestfallen.

"Bye Ragna!" Noel said happily, opening the front door, Jin following her out and closing it behind them.

Ragna let out a sigh of relief, running his hand through his hair. He was glad they didn't ask; it would be hard to explain to them why. And if he did, they'd refuse to leave him here by himself. Since the dishes were done, he decided sleeping it off would be the best thing to do. Noticing more plates on the table, probably from Jin and Noel(seriously, how old was he getting to not even realize that he hadn't washed their dishes yet), he walked over, going go pick them up.

It was only until then that he realized his hands were shaking uncontrollably.

He decided attempting to clean that up was really, really stupid.

He inhaled sharply, his right arm seizing up considerably. The muscles tightened more and more, and he clenched his teeth, trying to stop from crying out. They finally relaxed, and he let out a breath he didn't even realize he was holding.

 _'I've gotta take my medicine now. Focus, focus...'_ he thought to himself, barely making it up the stairs. He hurried to the bathroom, yanking open the mirror cabinet. Red and green eyes searched desperately for the bottle, but he settled on a few painkillers. Ibuprofen, hydrocodone, vicodin, tylenol. He grabbed them all, placing them on the bathroom counter. Running to his room, he rummaged through his bedside drawer. Spotting the small container of prescription medicine, he snatched it up, making his way to the bathroom once more.

He was halfway there, _halfway,_ when his legs decided to give out. Collapsing to the ground hard, he drew in shaky breaths, throat feeling unnecessarily tight. Not giving up yet, he dragged his way across the floor desperately.

Making it to the bathroom, he took a pill out, throwing it into his mouth hastily and drinking some water to help it go down. It was supposed to set in 30 minutes, and maybe finally, just finally, the pain would go away.

* * *

It wasn't going away, in fact, it had turned worse. Vertigo had taken over, his vision blurry and dull. His hands were still shaking, and nausea was growing inside of him. He ripped the bandages off of his arm, revealing its pitch black color. His veins were visible, red and _disgusting._ They pulsed, his arm twitching, acting up in a way it never had before. He dangerously eyed the other bottles on the bathroom counter, his fingers itching to grab one and take another pill.

He read the label. 2 or 3 wouldn't kill him, so he tentatively opened the container, dropping some into his palm.

 _'Yeah...a few won't hurt...'_ he thought to himself, darkness peeling at the edges of his vision.

If it would stop _this,_ then why should he worry?

* * *

Kagura sighed as he was walking home from school. Today had not only been slow, but boring. Ragna hadn't come to school today, his siblings not even having a proper reason as to why. They had a presentation for their class, but due to his absence they weren't even able to present it. Meaning points off for lateness. He trailed behind Makoto, Noel, and Jin.

"Kagura? You wanna come over? I invited Jin and Noel, and their pretty much for it." she balanced on her feet, looking at him expectantly.

"No...I'm good." he replied flatly. Today was just not his day. She giggled, a hand flying up to cover her mouth.

"Really?! Usually you're quick to come over any chance you get! But if you say so. Come on guys! My mom knows how to cook real good stuff!" she said, running down the sidewalk, Jin and Noel catching up to her. Jin glanced back at him, almost expectantly, before turning from his head as if nothing happened. Kagura blinked before looking up.

The clouds were gray, and a drop of rain hit his nose.

 _'Maybe I should go visit...'_ he thought, making his way down the block to Ragna's house. Something was nagging at the back of his mind. Something desperate, almost miserable. Something had to be wrong. As he walked up to the front door, he rang the bell.

No response.

He rang it again.

Still no response.

Soon, he was alternating between rapid knocks and frantic bell pushing, but still no response. He gripped the doorknob, and surprisingly, it was unlocked. He cautiously stepped inside, he could be caught any second. Ragna wasn't particularly the best to interact with when angry. Especially for snooping around.

"Pardon the intrusion..." he whispered mostly to himself, eyes flicking around the house he somewhat knew. It was still strange walking in here, yet it definitely gave a feeling of home. Even cozy, if lightly colored walls were anything to go by. He had a faint feeling that Ragna had some skill in interior decorating, but he pushed it aside. He had to chew him out for not showing up to school.

After searching the first floor, Kagura decided it was finally time to go up a floor. Ragna was no where here. Did he go out? Was he hiding? Was he asleep? As he walked up the steps as quietly as he could, his ears picked up a faint sound.

 _Crying?_

He reached the top, following the sound to the best of his ability. The bathroom door was slightly ajar, so he decided to peek in. He swallowed the soft gasp that almost escaped his mouth from what he saw inside.

He's hunched over, vomiting, tears running down cheeks flushed in protest or from exertion, Kagura can't tell. His shoulders are shaking, and somewhere in between, Kagura can hear choked, miserable sobs along with short, pained gasps. _'This is the most I can do,'_ he figures as his feet move on their own, his hand reaching out to rub his back soothingly.

Ragna flinches, freezing up considerably, about to turn around, but then he's hunched over again, _and its even worse this time_ as he continues to throw up into the toilet, shoulder blades moving erratically as he continues. And Kagura wants to turn his eyes away, he really does, but he just can't find it in himself to do it. His fingers twitch, and he reaches forward with his free hand to brush Ragna's bangs out of his eyes, the silkiness of his hair still reminiscent on his fingertips.

It pains Kagura to think of it, but he can't really deny; if he were just crying like this, sweetly, his voice sounding shattered like broken glass, then he would find it rather arousing.

But now was not the time for that.

It takes a good fifteen extra minutes until he's finally done, and at first Kagura's glad, because now that his system is cleared out, maybe he can actually get some good rest, but then he groans, clutching his stomach as tears begin to prick at his eyes again, and he aimlessly reaches towards the counter and _its then when Kagura sees all those empty pill bottles on the ground._

All types of pain killers litter the floor, a few different colored pills all over the floor. He figures that in Ragna's desperateness, he had probably spilled some. It makes his chest tighten in a strange way, somewhat sorrowful, aching and throbbing and he _doesn't know why._

Then it hits him.

He's hurting because _Ragna's hurting and when he's hurting nothing is okay._ Nothing will ever be okay until he isn't hurting. But obviously, he's been hurting for a good few hours and that's why Kagura feels like a jerk, even when the situation wasn't really in his hands. Ragna finally grasps the bottle, but Kagura snatches it out of his hands within seconds.

"Have you been using this?" he asks, examining the small bottle in his hands. Ragna flinches, but he's already reaching out again.

"Give it to me."

"I don't think I should. How many have you taken already?" he tosses it around between his hands. "You do realise you're only supposed to take one of these, right?"

"That's none of your damn business. Give it to me. I need it."

"Yeah, and have you risk dying from an ultra overdose? I think not."

"Doesn't matter. Hasn't killed me before. Won't kill me now. Just...just hand it over already, prick."

"You've _overdosed before?"_ Kagura asks with an urgency he didn't know could exist in his laidback self. Because his mind just decided to run over the possibilities. How _many_ times has he overdosed? How many times has he come close to his life slipping away? How many times has he _not had anyone there for him?_ And now that pain in his chest returns tenfold and he's almost choking because _if he didn't find out about this who the hell would have?_

"Again. That's none of your damn business. Give it to me already."

"Are you shitting me? I'm not giving this back to you. Not now, maybe not even forever."

"Kagura, I _swear to Sister._ Fucking give it back already." Ragna's hand is tapping on the tiles of the bathroom floor. Just a little more, and Kagura is sure he's going to give up soon enough.

"I'm serious. I'm not giving this back to you."

" _Please."_ he grinds out, pretty much begging at this point. Kagura watches in amazement. Never would he imagine Ragna to be so needy. Especially for drugs. Or medicine. Whichever works. He stands up now, stuffing it in his pocket.

"Why do you even need it so bad-oh..." he trails off, eyes catching a glimpse of Ragna's arm, black like his scarf. Its twitching, perhaps even pulsating, and Ragna shoots him a glare.

"Don't give me that look, you dumbass. Why the hell else would I be chugging painkillers?" he snarls, gripping his arm tightly as the muscles tighten painfully. A hoarse whimper escapes his throat, and Kagura feels even worse. He was probably sobbing so much that his throat is pretty much raw. That would explain why the volume of his voice barely reached above a whisper.

"Hey, just...clean yourself up or something, you don't want the smell of vomit following you around all day." Kagura says lightly, bending down to pick up empty medicine bottles. Ragna watches silently, probably waiting for Kagura to step out of the bathroom. So when he's done, he steps out wordlessly, hearing the water turn on.

He spots a sofa in the second living area, and decides to go sit. Ragna may take a while, so he contemplates what has happened in the past hour. He thinks about how things would've turned out, had he stayed over at Makoto's, and they all come home to Ragna dead on the bathroom's ceramic tiles. It was a scary thout, and Noel and Jin probably wouldn't recover at all. He doubted that he would, too. It was shockingly realistic, the possibilities of such an outcome. He made a mental note to stop by after school every time Ragna stayed home. The bathroom door swung open, Ragna walking silently to his room, hair dripping with water, a towel around his waist. Having some restraint, Kagura turned away, doing his best to not look. He knew he wouldn't be able to stop himself if he saw water running down his body, droplets following the lines of muscle.

Ragna now steps out of his room, expression blank as he wordlessly sits next to Kagura, towel still over his head. Kagura watches how he dries his hair, and how it somehow ends up looking how it usually does, spiky and silky and soft to the touch. Feeling it a good time to talk, Kagura speaks up.

"So...wanna explain?" he asked cautiously, a shiver running up his spine as Ragna looked over at him, eyes unreadable.

"Its kinda self explanatory, dumbass." he mumbles, glancing down at his arm. "Doctors don't know what it is. Causes a variety of symptoms. It can even become paralyzed outta nowhere. There are just...days like this when it decides to have its way. It tightens up, and makes me feel like I wanna die."

"..." Kagura says nothing, head mulling over everything that he just said. Is it a disease? Just this one arm is causing him pain? Why not cut it off? Why don't they know what it is.

"I know what you're thinking," he groans, face palming. "Just because I said I wanted to die didn't mean I was trying to knock myself out with painkillers. I have a prescription for it. Its supposed to numb the pain in 30 minutes. It didn't."

"So you..." Kagura said, wanting him to continue.

"Thought that if one didn't work, then downing the hold bottle would do the trick. I was wrong, of course. Then I started taking other ones, then I was finishing off bottles in minutes. Things started getting bad. I couldn't see shit, the pain was getting worse, my hands wouldn't stop _shaking."_ he chuckled flatly. "I thought, _'You really fucked up this time; you can't come back from this'._ But then, I figured, I could get it all out before they really started taking affect. I forced myself to vomit, but then it wouldn't stop." he was struggling to talk now, his head bowed.

"M-My throat felt like it was being torn apart, and it was just so unbearable that I started crying." he rubbed his eyes as if he was wiping away tears. "But that's over now, so you can leave."

"Jin and Noel are at Makoto's. And I'll be damned if I were to leave you here by yourself." Kagura said, a steely determination rising inside of him. "So I'm not moving."

"What are you, my mom?"

"More like best friend, if anything."

"Best friend? You know, I find I haven't really complimented you on your sense of humor. You're fucking hilarious if you think that."

"Enough to become a comedian? Why, I think I've found a new career path."

"Piss off already." Ragna said, obviously tired of their banter. He propped his arms behind his head, crossing one leg over the other. He looked to his side, spotting Kagura staring at him. "The hell are you looking at?"

"You're arm..its so..."

"Hideous? Yeah, why else do you think I have it bandaged all the damn time?" he says, and he watches as Kagura gulps, hand reaching out.

"Can I touch it?" Kagura asks, almost nervously, eyes trained on it.

"S-Sure?" Ragna says, unevenly. He moves his arm over, and Kagura reaches out, fingertips running across darkened flesh, tracing red veins so bright that they seemed to glow. He unconsciously draws in a breath, and lets out a hiss as fingers press against his skin.

Yet, he finds Kagura's hand so unbearably _warm._

His fingers are running across his skin, and its so _soothing_ and Ragna really does feel like dying, but in a really good way and now he knows he's _fucking addicted_ to it because he can't even remember the last time he's touched this arm, only touching it to change bandages every once in a while. And he feels like dozing off, because its relaxing and now he's feeling for a well deserved nap. And its not even a matter of touching his arm, but just _touching in general_ because he knows its been far too long that someone has been this close to him.

He definitely knows his face is red because Kagura is full on feeling up his arm like no tomorrow and he definitely has to draw a line or things are going to progress and who knows what he'll do when he allows his mind to stop giving him proper reasoning and-

Then Kagura is lifting his hand and placing soft kisses on the back, and on his fingertips, his purple eyes flicking up every so often as if he's testing Ragna to tell him to stop.

"I-Idiot! What the hell are you doing?" he exclaims, and Kagura pulls away, snickering like the idiot he is.

"Well, you seemed to like it. And I enjoyed doing it, so no worries, right?"

"I...that's no fucking excuse for being a creep!"

"Hm. Well I guess I could say I was practicing. For when I get married." Kagura says. Ragna assumes he's made a weird face when Kagura doubles over, laughing out loud. "No, but seriously, don't you know? That"s how it works in honeymoons." he grabs Ragna's hand, Ragna watching with bored interest.

"They begin with the hand. You know, kissing and stuff. The ladies like it. Then they move down. Like they're searching for something. Squeezing here and there. Then," he grins deviously as Ragna moves backwards on the couch, expression hesitant yet curious, like a stray cat. "They start taking stuff off. Ladies like the huge fancy dresses. I don't really. Its gotta be simple and cute, easy to take off, like this." he gestures to the loose undershirt Ragna has on.

He suddenly feels a bit self conscious, having Kagura comment on his clothing choice. It makes him feel like he's watching too closely, like he's undressing him with his eyes, though he doesn't have much on.

"Then things get fun. Really fun."

"You sound like you're speaking from experience."

"Not exactly. Ladies like me. They don't love me. Besides, I have preferences."

"Like what?"

"Hmm. I don't know. Maybe someone with hetero chromia, and some really white hair. They've gotta be able to pack a really bad punch. And they've gotta have the foulest mouth on the planet."

"Whoa. Good luck finding someone like that." Ragna smirks, rolling his eyes as Kagura pouts, eyes looking sad.

"You wound me, Ragna. That one hurt."

"Good."

"You're a jerk, you know that?"

"Yeah, the one and only. Hope you'll be able to take care of this." Ragna mumbles, laying on his side, and Kagura freezes up.

Because if Ragna is being this casual then maybe, just _maybe,_ he has a shot at this boyfriend thing. And being boyfriends. Maybe. He has to ask him out first, if anything. As of right now, they're on the 'More than best friends but less than dating'.

"Is that a challenge? Because if it is, I am _so ready_ to take it on." Kagura says boldly, thought he feels like he's going to explode on the inside. He scoots closer to Ragna, stiffening when the other switches sides, the upper half of his body laying on Kagura's lap.

"What is it they say? In sickness and in health?" Ragma mutters, closing his eyes and Kagura runs his hands through his spikes, albeit with shaky hands.

"More like in sickness and ineffective painkillers." Kagura mumbles, preoccupied with Ragna's mess of a hairstyle.

"Really? As much of a idiot you are, I thought you were a pretty effective painkiller." Ragna says, and Kagura swears that he sees his ears turn a bit pink. He feels his own face heat up, because that line in itself was embarrassingly cute. And Ragna was rarely associated with 'cute'.

"Damn it, Ragna that was illegal."

"Yep. I know." Ragna says, chuckling. Its the first time Kagura's heard him sound genuinely happy, his laugh reminiscent of something, like a soft bell or wind chime. And he definitely wants to hear it again.

He finds that he'll gladly be Ragna's painkiller, whenever he needs to.

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

 **So how was that for a one-shot fic? That accompanies my main one? I think I made it a bit too descriptive though. But that's just my writing style. I hope I kept them somewhat in character. Ragna didn't curse as much, hell, I'm not even sure that he uses the f word in the actual game. Well, they're not allowed to, but we'll discuss that another time.**

 **I decided to make the arm a part of the story. I mean, its part of Ragna. How could I take away his suffering? That would be too cruel of me. But I hope it worked out well in this fic. I also kept in the fact that it could become paralyzed sometimes(a reference to CP). So I hope that its not too bad. I know this is just a fic, but I truly hope people don't abuse drugs too much. Or at all. Its a struggle, and people use it as an escape, but I really hope that they don't do that.**

 **I hope you all enjoyed it, and expect to see more.**


End file.
